I get hungry
when I go to my dentist. We talk food. I catch him up on the latest restaurant
openings; he shares the latest dish he’s whipped up. I trust a dentist who
cooks. Just his demeanor when he talks about food and cooking leads me into the
inner sanctum of someone who not only loves what he does but also knows how to
do it well. Our conversation starts easy, then, the more we talk food, the
faster we go, working our taste buds into a lather.
My last visit revolved
around lobsters. “I haven’t steamed a lobster all summer,” he said. “My recipe
is inspired by one of my favorite chefs, Jasper White [Summer Shack]. Now with the abundance
of high quality garlic infused EVOO (extra virgin olive oil), this recipe is a
snap.” He grills the lobsters instead.
The caveat, of course, is killing the
lobster first.
I, too, have
killed lobsters, but by boiling them. I’ve also snipped off the faces of squirming
soft-shell crabs, cleaned their gills before sautéing. I hated it. Hated it.
Hated it. My stomach squirmed. I stomped my feet in protest as though shaking
off my actions would make them kinder. It is true. I ate those soft shell crabs
with a side of guilt. You want sea-to-sauté? I’m not your gal.
Dr. K ticked off
his recipe for grilled lobster: Garlic infused EVOO, lobsters from Market Basket.
Market Basket? He explained they are just as good and less expensive. “My knife
of choice is a 7-inch Global chef.”
I jotted down
notes in my illegible scrawl, bought my lobsters at Roche Bros., and made sure
my mother’s gas grill was good to go. If I were going to grill lobster it would
be under the fading light of day on Cape Cod—a quintessential New England late
summer supper.
My nerves
mounted as I thought about the lobsters kicking inside the brown paper bag. I
needed support. An online search led me to a Fine Cooking video: “How to kill a
lobster”.
“It’s more
humane to kill your lobster before cooking,” says the nice, apron-clad young
woman while a banded-clawed lobster frantically gropes the air with his spindly
legs on the cutting board before her. “That way it dies a quick death.”
First, you freeze
the lobsters for 20 minutes to numb them, surely easing the pain and slowing
down its movements so, as the woman says, “It’s easier to work with.” A bedtime
story is optional.
Second, you need
a sharp knife to conduct your business. The idea is you cut into the brain
behind the eyes and then down the middle of the lobster, delivering a quick
“painless” death.
Here’s where the
plan started to go wrong. I didn’t have a 7-inch Global chef’s knife. Though I
love my mother dearly, she didn’t have a sharp knife in the house. My father’s
fishing knife, once used for gutting his soft-belly catch, was duller than a
Latin lecture series.
Impatience and
hunger interfered. I pulled the lobsters out of the freezer five minutes early,
which was just enough time to freak them out without slowing down anything.
The lobsters
flailed against my dull knife. My rant, intended for the lobsters, was a bad
attempt at calming myself. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”
Traumatized and
exhausted by the botched operation, I took a deep breath and slathered on the
olive oil as best I could and placed the lobsters on the grill. I turned their
reddening bodies over the sizzling heat without relief.
When we sat
down, I said grace. I asked for forgiveness. What we received in their curled garlicky
grilled tails was a morsel of gratitude and hard-shelled humbleness I was
forced to digest.
QUICK & EASY
GRILLED LOBSTER WITH GARLIC EVOO
Though summer is equated with lobster,
after Labor Day and through late November is also a great time to buy lobster.
It’s when the shells are hard and there’s more meat per pound. As an
alternative to the chill-and-kill method, Chef Corey Marcoux of Brine OysterBar in Newburyport said another method is to hold the lobster upside down so
the head touches a hard surface. “Puts them to sleep,” he said.
INGREDIENTS:
2 1-1/4 to 1-1/2
lbs. lobster (1 lobster per guest)
Garlic infused
EVOO
PREPARATION:
Purchase the
lobsters live. Kill the lobsters before grilling and butterfly in half. Rinse
lobsters under cold water. Place them on a baking sheet and dry.
Brush entire
lobster with garlic-infused EVOO, season with salt and pepper. Place lobsters
on medium grill and tent with an 8-by-12-inch disposable aluminum pan. Grill
for about 7 minutes, turning occasionally. Apply more EVOO half way through the
cooking. The meat should be opaque when done.
Sides: Serve the
lobsters with Tom Colicchio’s creamless creamed corn and my potato salad.
Wine: As Dr. K
says, “I’ve been enjoying this recipe with Oregon Pinot Noirs.” The dentist
knows he’s talking about.
Disclaimer: This is not a post for PETA.
I’ve taken to heart what it means to be a carnivore, an omnivore, a picador and
a metaphor—none of it is easy. But I’m not giving it up. A steak or burger
feeds my occasional craving. The salmon sushi is a buttery bite carrying
Omega-3s. Giving up beef, chicken, fish or pork in my diet would be like Mario
Batali giving up his orange Crocs. It’s not happening.